Pretty Things

Photo by Cassie Frese

Photo by Cassie Frese

Today I hung up my wings
And I cried to see them go
Into the back of the closet
Unsure of when next they might emerge.

Today I gently fingered the leather
Of the armor I loan to my friend
As I put it into a basket
Unsure if I will ever see her again.

Today I put away my sword belt
And I cleared the real money
And necessary things from my bags
While leaving behind coppers and tags.

Today I put away the warrior
That everyone can see
And instead I return to being the warrior
That dresses and reasons like me.

My fighting spirit cannot be hung on a rack,
My determination contained in a basket
Or my dreams left behind with the copper.
Even when no one else can see,
There is
And always will be
A Tyrel in me.

Today I posted my rings for sale
From a marriage that didn’t survive.
I cried to know I will soon see them go,
But I’ve bills to pay,
A dog to feed,
And nothing is so pretty
That it outweighs my need to fly.

I am still The Girl With the Wings

We Can Be Heroes

source: GATAG

source: GATAG

Heroes all and every one
Heroes fighting ’til we’ve won
Work through rise and set of sun
Making right ’til we’re undone

Heroes rise and heroes fall
Humbly we accept the call
Shedding dreams, forsaking all
Collect our swords, defend the wall

Heroes choices we must make
Heroes woundings we must take
Deny ourselves for others’ sake
Courage show although it’s fake

Some of us are born to it
Some of us choose to seek it
But most of us become Heroes because it was thrust upon us

Inside I quake. Inside I shake.
I cry and scream and drown in lakes
Of circumstance beyond control.
I just want us all to come out of this life
Alive.

Grief

What would you do?Grief
It is, in fact, the death
Of something.
You’ve been given a fatal prognosis.
You’ve only 2 weeks for your marriage to live.
What would you do?

When confronted with
So little time
Most people
Gather their loved ones,
Forgive,
Go skydiving,
Make whoopie,
Plan the funeral,
Watch the sun rise.

These things make
No sense
At the death of a marriage.
It’s not tragic enough for the family to gather.
I’m far too angry today to forgive.
Skydiving is an unnecessary drain on
Already limited finances.
And you don’t make love to the person
Who’s leaving you.
The court proceedings are planned.
I shall watch the sun rise.

I shall watch the sun rise
With a cup of creamy sweet coffee in hand.
I shall stroke the fur of my fluffy dog
And feel the warmth of him
And the gentle sun’s rays,
And the gentle swaying of the hammock.

No symbolism here.
No deep thoughts or comfort that
Time marches on as the sun
Takes the sky.
There is only warmth,
And coffee,
And a feeling all is at rest,
Everything has stopped,
And nothing is more important
Than this moment.

I survived
The death of my marriage.
I survived that one thing
I never believed that I could.

Sponge

I feel like a sponge.
I soak it all up and take it all in
Involuntarily
Because that is my job.

All your dirty water,
Bacteria,
Gross and grime,
Your opinions,
Your lifestyle,
Your wants and desires;
You’ve used me to clean the world
With little thought to my own plans and needs.

Heartlessly you irradiate me.
I’ve begun to smell.
You hate me
For all the ugliness you’ve forced into my being.

So many voices shout in my head.
Such a popular sponge am I!
They wheedle and prattle and
Convince each other they are right.

No one really cares about the nasty old sponge.
For one moment of peace
I wish the dog would just eat me.